It was a typo. I was writing an email to my sister and I began it with “Hell, Melanie!”. I didn’t notice it, nor did she. When she replied, I saw my original message, and my glaring mistake. What a difference one letter makes! Just the other day, something similar happened, only this time I caught the error before clicking “send”. I was trying to close my email to a friend by writing “Love, Valerie”. Instead, I wrote “Loved, Valerie”. As I quickly backspaced the extra ‘d’, I realized that it was true. I am “loved Valerie”. I am loved by the Savior Who died upon a wooden cross to save my soul. I am loved by the person I was writing – what a joy! I am loved by my mom and dad (even though he’s in Heaven, I know he loves me) and my sister. I am loved deeply by my husband. I have five children who regularly say or do kind things to show their love for me. It thrilled my heart to count the people by whom I am loved. I love them, too.
I go through each day being really hard on myself. I mentally criticize my ability to be a wife and mother. I beat myself up for past sins and mistakes. I despise the way I look, especially my dress size. I analyze conversations after the fact and think how stupid I must have sounded. I even sometimes re-read blog posts and decide, that yes, it’s official: I’m an idiot.
It’s the truth, you know. I mess up a lot. I’m far from perfect in word, action, or appearance. But in spite of all of that, I am loved.
And so are you.
Loved and with love,