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A Whole New World

Valerie Basham

January 12, 2012

Okay, maybe “world” is too strong a word. What you are reading now is, at least, a whole new site. I have a new “dot com”,valeriewritenow.com, as a matter of fact. For years I’ve been blogging. For years I’ve been looking for my own online presence. I found it…I mean, me...you know what I mean. Why do I always make things so complicated? (Don’t answer that.) I am Valerie. (Shocker.) I am a writer, even if my words are limited to this blog. I am living. Now. Let me say, “Thank you, Lord!” to that! So, as the father on My Big, Fat Greek Wedding said, “Dere you go!” My blog! Valerie (me) Write (what I do) Now (present tense).

I started blogging way back in 2007. I blogged about my “Life in the Hill Country” of Texas. Then, I moved. I wasn’t in the “hill country” anymore. (Great blogging foresight, ay?) I just couldn’t imagine leaving Texas. I loved it. I miss it still. Now, I’m in southwest Arkansas. Home to nothing spectacular. Oh, well, there’s Bill Clinton and Mike Huckabee. And they’re politicians. Like I said, nothing spectacular. There I was, with a problem: what to do about the blog? I decided to start another one, this time called “Valerie’s Hope Chest“…get it? I live in “Hope”? Anyway, I didn’t like it after a while. I started to worry that someone would think I was referring to the front of a torso or something. I changed the title to “Joy in the Journey”. Nah. Didn’t dig that, either. I mean, I want to have joy in this journey of life, but the blog wasn’t about that all the time. Or even most of the time. Let’s face it, I’m not that joyful. Most days, I’m smiling through the pain. And one thing I must do, wherever I am, is be real. I’m not “Joy”. I’m…Valerie. (Yes, this blog is packed with profound truths! Keep reading! )

Around that time, a man who used to be in our church, (and one of the few who have left that still like us), started calling my hubby “The Bishop”. It follows that he called me “the Bishop’s wife”. I liked that name. I’m a pastor’s wife, wherever I go, whatever I do, that is what I am. So it worked.

I’m still a pastor’s wife, and Lord willing, I’ll always be. But I noticed that the title implies that this blog will have a ministry focus. It doesn’t always. I often write about homeschooling, day-to-day life, poetry and some days, I share photos and videos. Most of my life has very little to do with being a PW. The one constant, however, is me. Here, you will always find my words, my thoughts, my heart, my beliefs, my life. You will see what’s happening in my life right now…well, I mean write now.

My old blogspot address automatically redirects to the new URL. I have a new design, but that will probably change as the days go by. The feeds should still work. If you experience a problem, please contact me and I’ll do my best to figure it all out. I have a new blog button, so, please pick it up before you go. Oh, and, one more thing: I’ve started a new Facebook page, so please hop over and “Like” me.

It’s a new day, and a new “world”, the online kind, anyway. I’m enjoying each and every moment! Thank you so much for being here, for being part of my world.

Satan’s Day Off

Valerie Basham

3 comments

January 5, 2012

“Did you hear about Bro. Smith?” whispers Mrs. Know-it-All to a small group of ladies. “I heard he dropped a missionary just because he didn’t think he was working hard enough over on the field.”

“Oh? I heard that he got bullied by his deacons and was forced to drop him!” replied Mrs. Busy-Body.

“No, no, that’s not it. They got into a knock-down-drag-out and the pastor let him go.” chirrped Mrs. I’m-Always-Right.

“Actually, you are all wrong,” chimed in Mrs. Verbose, “that pastor ran everyone off from his church and they just didn’t have the money to support that missionary anymore.”

I’ve heard, and sadly been privy to, conversations much like the above. Word gets around about a Pastor and his ministry, his relationships with his family, evangelists and other pastors or missionaries. Some of it might be true, but nine times out of ten, none of it is.

With the internet at everyone’s fingertips these days, lies and half-truths are spreading like wildfire. As a pastor’s wife, it’s irksome to hear a story re-told over and over and each time hearing something new! It’s been very interesting to hear a story that I was involved in directly, come back around to me completely wrong!

We often think of gossip as something that only church members struggle with, but the truth is everyone struggles with it! Including those in ministry! If we look closely, we can find preachers talking about other preachers/evangelists/missionaries and their petty disagreements, un-spiritual preachers spreading lies or gossip just to tear other men down and make themselves look better, pastor’s wives who struggle with insecurity spreading rumors…the list could go on. Much of this takes place on Facebook or blogs…like mine! {Yikes! Doing a quick mental check of blog content. All clear. Phew.} Here are some thoughts on how to know if you can trust online information:

1. Do you personally know the blog author? If not, be careful!
2. Is the person being written about violating a scripture? It’s not worth your time arguing about passing the offering plate or putting a box at the back of the auditorium. If you disagree with a person, so what? Don’t ruin their lives because they disagree with you on some silly thing. If they are violating God’s law and you’re reading it online, WARNING! It could be an attempt to soil a good man by spreading lies. The internet is not a good court in which to try a person. Best leave it to the Lord and His judgment. His ways are best.(2 Sam. 22:31)
3. Is the spirit of the blog one that seeks to destroy or build up? If the posts are always negative and bleak, then consider their point of view. Chances are, they will find the bad in all things! And it’s there if you look for it.
4. Are they trying to increase hits for their website? Many moons ago, a friend of mine posted an article on his blog regarding two well known preachers and their debate. That post received thousands of hits. Thousands. And he didn’t even have an opinion. It was all a test! Newsworthy names receive hits. Hits mean visitors to that blogger’s ads. That means money for the blogger. So be careful little eyes what you read. Especially online.

Let me say that there are “wolves in sheep’s clothing” who need to be called out, no doubt about it. Pastor’s who steal from the church, commit adultery or lie need to be named. Paul did this in 2 Tim. 4:14. But idle conversation about how “Bro. or Mrs. So-and-So” disagrees with me on some minor issue is unnecessary and painful. Satan wants to destroy God’s work and the best way to do that is by turning men of God and their wives on each other. They will attack and destroy the work of the Lord and Satan won’t have to lift a finger. It sort of gives the devil a day off!

Let’s not give him that helping hand this year. Please pray for your pastor and your church!

A Fresh Start

Valerie Basham

4 comments

January 4, 2012

Well, I started a challenge back on December first and…it didn’t go very well. Do the words “crash” and “burn” mean anything to you? Yeah. It was bad. So, off with the old and on with the new, right? Yes! I’m starting fresh now. The holidays are over, my anniversary is behind me and there are 12 weeks until the next birthday in my family (which happens to be my own! *yippee!*). This seems to be the perfect time to start a new habit! I’m not necessarily taking that same challenge, but I am going to do my best not to eat out or eat dessert. But, let’s face it, real life is real life, sometimes you can’t avoid eating out. Or chocolate. My keys will be choosing carefully at restaurants and moderation with chocolate. Hey, chocolate is not the enemy. I purchased a food diary at a bookstore over the holidays. It’s a nice way to record what I’m eating. I don’t have a set number of calories/fat grams/ Points that I’m shooting for. I think (read: hope) that just writing down what I eat everyday will be a good thing. I already exercise three or more times a week, so surely if I watch my intake I can lose this 20 pounds that won’t budge…surely.

I hope…{biting lip}

Moving on. I am also working harder at writing. I’ve ordered two books on the subject and I hope to read them this year. They include exercises, so it will take longer to work through them, but I’m hopeful. I have also made a list of books on my shelf that I need to read this year. Books I purchased…a long time ago, but have not yet read. I want to buy a Kindle, but I cannot justify spending $200 on an e-reader when I still have old fashioned books eyeing me from the shelf across the room…big, sad eyes. Eyes that say, “Why, oh why haven’t you read me? You know I will be a help to you, you know you will find enjoyment in me…why?” I must give in and read my dear friends who have been neglected. I’ve also made a list of books that I’m giving away. I’ve posted them on Paperbackswap.com and hope to free up shelf space soon for ahem… more books.

On the homeschooling front, I’ve decided to begin new grammar and math books with my oldest kids. Mitchell was falling behind in math and Lauren was bored. Saxon math is our new program and guess what? I don’t think they’ll be bored anymore! heh heh! We are starting Easy Grammar this semester as well. Why this change in grammar? Because, my friends, I’m sick and tired of the groaning and the moaning. Because I’m a writer, and while I enjoy spotting split infinitives and finding grammar mistakes on signs, I know better than anyone that not knowing a direct object from a predicate nominative will not ruin my child’s life. I’m seeking peace, harmony and joy. If a new grammar workbook brings that to me, then small price to pay! I’ve done my research and Easy Grammar seems to have a building block approach which doesn’t take the hours a day that our current grammar work does. (Mostly because they are bogged down.) We are also going to begin using Story Starters for writing assignments. I got that book for free, so what can I lose? I’ll let you know how it all goes.

The New Year provides a time to restart, refresh and renew. I’m looking forward to doing all of those and more!

Oh, and if I get really hungry or have a chocolate craving at night (my weakest time of day), I may do some writing therapy. That means I’ll be posting more. That means you need to be there to cheer me on. Please? 🙂

Fourteen Years

Valerie Basham

4 comments

January 2, 2012

You

When life hands me lemons,
And the sun stops shining,
When my heart is so heavy
That my mouth starts whining,

You bring me flowers
In the form of your smile.
You buy me a milkshake
And sit for a while.

You hold my hand
In life’s darkest hours
You sing me a song
That is only ours.

You brighten each day
With a grin or a wink,
Wrap your arms around me
When I stand by the sink.

You lead me with strength,
You hold me with care,
You pray with your heart,
You’re always there.

You’re part of me now,
You were all along,
You’re the mate to my soul,
You’re the words to my song.

I just want to say so
That everyone knows,
How I’m thankful for you;
My heart overflows.

Read Your Bible, Pray Every Day!

Valerie Basham

2 comments

January 1, 2012

Do you remember that song? “Read your Bible, pray everyday, pray everyday, pray everyday. Read your Bible pray every day and you’ll grow, grow, grow!” As you say “grow”, you inch up taller and taller. Well, I don’t go around singing that song (much) anymore, but it’s true. You might not actually get taller by reading God’s Word, but you certainly do grow – spiritually! In fact, the song also says, “Don’t read your Bible forget to pray and you’ll shrink, shrink, shrink.” That’s true, too! Reading God’s word everyday keeps it fresh in our minds, easy to recall and readily available to claim in a tough situation.

How ’bout starting this year off with a goal to read your Bible and pray everyday? Here is a link to my Christian Helps page – it has a variety of online resources that can help you in your daily walk with God. And, here are some new Bible reading schedules I just found!

Read at your pace and check it off as you go!
Read your Bible in a year
Read your Bible in 60 days
Read your Bible in 30 days

Happy New Year! May we begin the year, and each day therein, with the precious Word of God.

So Long

Valerie Basham

no comments

December 31, 2011

I’m so very happy to see the year ending. Okay, it wasn’t that bad of a year. I mean, every year has its unwanted hardships, but I’ve had many blessings this year, too. The fact is, I’m just a “fresh start” kind of person. I enjoy the beginning of a new year, a new month, why, even a new day brings limitless possibilities of hope and excitement! Even if 2011 had been the best year ever, I’d still be happy to see it end, just so a new one could begin. I like new beginnings. I like making lists and goals. I like shooting for the stars.

I’m looking forward to 2012. I can’t control what happens in this new year, but I can control my reactions to those happenings. I want to do better at “reacting”. I want to have more faith and less panic when things go awry. (Don’t you love that word?) I want to read more, write more, and love more. I want to laugh more, relax more and work more. I want to worry less, eat less and doubt less.

How ’bout you? Got any New Year’s hopes and dreams?

Whatever the New Year brings, I pray that this is the year that we live for God more than ever.

Happy New Year!

From Our Home to Yours

Valerie Basham

3 comments

December 24, 2011

Thank you for your support and encouragement. May God bless you richly in the New Year.

Happy Birthday, Jesus

Valerie Basham

1 comment

December 22, 2011

I try to make a birthday cake for Jesus each year. Years ago, I chose a special cake for the purpose, one that I make only at Christmas. As a child, this was my favorite Christmas dessert. In 8th grade, I was really excited to serve it at a Christmas party I was hosting for my friends. I spent the night before the party with my best friend, who lived in an RV trailer at our church. (Her parents traveled in evangelism.) We got permission to sleep in the church nursery that night, and almost never awoke. Because of the situation, my party got postponed. The next week, however, the party went on and this cake was on the menu.

This year, I realized that this cake is also a great lesson about Jesus! I love object lessons!

1. The cake uses a white cake mix and Cool Whip frosting – both are white and pure. This symbolizes the sinless Son of God.
2. It looks like an ordinary cake, until you cut it! Once sliced, you can see the surprise! Jesus looked like a man, but He was God in the flesh.
3. The red Jello reminds us of the reason He came – to die for our sins.
4. The green Jello reminds us that through His sacrifice, we live forever, and we can grow in grace.
5. Singing “Happy Birthday” to Jesus helps focus little minds on the One we live for.

We had our birthday celebration for Jesus last night, ahead of the hub-bub of the actual day. We are also planning on opening gifts after our Sunday morning services, another way of putting Christ first.

Each year I fight the urge to get caught up in the “commercialism” of Christmas. I feel ashamed that I worry so much about food coming out okay, about having enough money to buy gifts for everyone, about whether or not people will like my gifts, and on and on. This day is for the Lord! The greatest gift we can give Him is the re-dedicating of our lives to His service. He died for us, we should live for Him. And while that doesn’t cost a penny, it’s the most expensive thing we can give.

Happy birthday, Jesus!

Just Saying Thanks

Valerie Basham

2 comments

December 20, 2011

I wanted to drop in and say thank you for praying for my friends, Donna and Audrey. They are recovering well so far. Donna has a long road to go, as her body adjusts to the new kidney. Please continue to pray that her body will not reject it in the future. Audrey posted on Facebook how grateful she is to be able to give part of herself to her sister. What a wonderful earthly demonstration of Christ’s love!

Also, thank you for the input regarding the photo of my youngest girl. I have ordered a print of the original photo, to see how it looks with the individual shots of my other kids. A friend of mine sent me an edited version. I will be getting it printed if the original looks too bad.

I am happy to report that my Christmas shopping is done! This the earliest this has ever happened. I usually end up doing a lot of shopping on Christmas Eve! I am now wrapping, cleaning and planning the menu for Christmas. My in-laws will be joining us, as well as my husband’s grandmother. We haven’t had company at Christmas in at least four years. I hope and pray your Christmas planning and celebrations are going well. May we not forget the Greatest Gift of all, the Lord Jesus Christ!

Moments that Changed My Life

Valerie Basham

1 comment

December 17, 2011

I’ve heard it said, “We do not remember days, we remember moments.” It got me thinking, “What would be the top ten most life changing moments I’ve experienced?” I thought it was a good question. So, here they are. As of this moment, anyway. 🙂

10. The moment that one of my teachers told me I should consider writing for a career. When I start to think, You’re a terrible writer, stop doing it. I recall her words. Her confidence in me gives me confidence. No, I’m not making my living that way…or am I? I don’t get money for it, but writing is my life. It’s one of the things God created me to do. My goal is to always glorify Him by my words, both written and spoken. (Yes, I fail often, but I’m still trying!)

9. The moment I accepted God’s painful will for my life. That was a tough, but excellent moment. I have had to re-live it over and over, because I tend to be an Indian giver about stuff like that. I accept it, then I don’t. Accept, don’t accept…you get the idea.

8. The moment my husband stopped me from taking my own life. He then proceeded to relocate our family just because he loved me. We had nothing. What a beautiful picture of Christ, giving Himself for His bride! I was recently told by someone that if God wanted me to be treated like trash, so what? But, God doesn’t want me to be treated like trash! He gave His only Son, Jesus, for me! That person probably wants me to be treated badly, but God doesn’t. And you know, I deserve the worst treatment one could imagine: I deserve Hell. I’m so thankful that God isn’t giving me what I deserve. Why, even the hardships of this life are for my good. (Rom.8:28) Praise the Lord, for this unspeakable gift.

7. The moment that God stopped me from going away to Bible college. It was amazing. I was headed there because it was a good place. But it wasn’t the best for me.

6. The moment my one and only real boyfriend (besides my husband) betrayed me. I was truly naïve. On so many levels. {shudder} Let’s not re-live that one. But, it changed me and my goals for my life, forever.

5. The moment I pledged to be pure until marriage. I was 12 years old. I had no idea that the moment I got up from making that vow, Satan would throw darts at me from every angle. By God’s grace, I kept that vow. But twern’t easy.

4. The moment my future husband started trying to win my heart. It was right out of the movies. For real.

3. The moment I became a mother. It set in motion so many wonderful and terrible experiences to follow. And I wouldn’t change a thing.

2. The moment I became a child of God. June 12, 1993, to be exact. That actual day was ordinary, but the days since then have been right out of a novel. Or maybe I just dramatize everything. Or maybe not! The Christian life is the best life ever. Not the easiest life ever, but since when did “easy” and “best” become synonyms? The best is often hard. But it’s the best.

1. The moment my dad died. I know. I you’re thinking, this is number one? Above salvation? Well, actually, it’s a close second, but everyone expects salvation to be number one. I thought I’d be different. What? I already am? oh. I also chose it because it is the event that has affected my walk with God the most so far. I know Him better and deeper than ever before. His grace envelops me, carries me and comforts me. He had been doing this before Dad’s death, but I didn’t really see it. I didn’t know it. Dad’s death changed so many things: my childhood died on that day, it was truly the day I grew up. Christmas will never be the same; my family will never be the same. It was the day that I learned as Job did, “I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.” (Job 42:5) I’d heard of the Lord before, I thought I’d seen Him, but I hadn’t. He is more real to me now than ever.

Time is the stuff life is made of, and that time consists of moments. Each moment of my life I can either look for the good or focus on the bad; be thankful for what I have, or dwell on that which I do not; endure the drama, or enjoy His peace. It’s up to me. I enjoy my life as a Christian, as a Pastor’s wife, as a homeschooling mother of five, as a writer. It is the best life in the world, because it’s the life God has chosen just for me.

As I look back on these moments, what a blessing it is to know that God was beside me for each and every one. A greater blessing is to know He’ll be with me forever.

Matthew 28:20 …lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen